Alright, here we go...(my first day of school)!

Yesterday was full of orientations, course outlines, and a bit of confusion...My official first day as a a graduate student.

I am so thankful that we moved to Montreal before the term began so we could settle in and orientate ourselves to our new home. Although I took full advantage of arriving here early by getting to know my colleagues, the project, and the campus...I was still slightly blindsided by the difference between undergrad and graduate school.

The point has changed.
Undergrads want/need a degree, and for various reasons. Whether it be their parents persistence, a chance to put off getting a "real" job, curiosity, a challenge, a true strive to push ones self further, a desire to be a professional, a desire to write a few abbreviated credentials after ones name etc.
In grad school, you better want to be there - or you won't be there very long. Consider this - an employee with a masters degree, on average, earns about the exact same amount as an employee with an undergraduate degree in the same field [(anecdotal evidence only) I must learn to reference everything].

The experience has changed.
Over my five years as an undergraduate student, I learned a great many things about how to survive in an academic setting. By the time I graduated last spring, I figured that I finally figured this school thing out; how to network, how to plan, how to balance school and personal life, who to turn to with questions, how to write exams, how to effectively use the library system, how to pack a lunch....Well, you get the idea. Yup, I was pretty sure I got it - and pretty sure that a number of students in my graduating class didn't get it at all. Congratulations, Candice! (That took five years, eh?)
Well, in order to get through yesterday I had to employ nearly every school-skill I've acquired, including how to take a test, in order to successfully proceed through the day and not leave overwhelmed. Yup, needed all those skills to get through. The "amazing" part - everyone else got through the day successfully too. Hmmm...

The focus has changed.
Grades do no matter. I repeat, grades do not matter. No one cares how well you did in comparison to the rest of the class. Most exams aren't even held in class. You simply, absolutely need to know this material and it will be applicable over the next two years. Memorizing the material and spitting it back out during a 2 hour exam period will get you no where. Period.

The respect-o-meter has changed.
In the undergraduate world, if you disagree with a professor - the professor is right and you are wrong. I have a friend that once challenged a prof in a business class on a comment regarding spirituality. Not only did the professor shut her down right in front of the entire class, he created a question on the final exam reflecting the disagreement. It was a multiple choice question - both her answer was an option as well as his answer. You see, scan cards used in multiple choice exams can only have one correct answer, all the other options are wrong. Now, which answer do you think the professor made the "correct" answer?
Yesterday, when the professor was explaining a concept in class, a grad student spoke out against it. The example given to explain the concept happened to be in the student's area of expertise (not the professor's). This resulted in a "debate" amongst the students, which was facilitated and encouraged by the professor. All sorts of intelligent comments, concerns, and questions were raised by a number of grad students. My mind was racing to keep up - that little voice of "oh, so much experience" was shouting "get in there and prove you are up to speed on this". So I went for it and got in there with an (intelligent???) contribution to the conversation - well I tried to at least, but got stuck because the word "progression" temporarily escaped my skull - I will be forever indebted to the anonymous student beside me who tactfully whispered it to me under her breath during the odd silence that fell when my mind was racing for the word and my face fell completely blank (and crickets cherped). I finished my oh so smooth "contribution" and the debate continued on, perpetuated by a number of other students. [Great job there "big girl", you almost kept up. Welcome to the big(ger) leagues???] The professor closed off the conversation by validating our points and stating that she withdraws her comments and thanked us for our contributions. Wait a minute...This was encouraged? Our opinions are valued? (Tom warned me about this!)

My drive has changed.
Simply put - I'm not after the degree. I'm after the experience, the challenge, and the ends that this means may get Tom and I. In order to fulfill our duty here on earth, or at least what we think our duty is, we need to get experience and knowledge under our belt. I'm sure Tom will have to remind me of this several times through out the next few years, but I'm sure that this difference will make the difference between a few years of pure stress resulting from the same drive of perfection that propelled me through my undergrad, and a few years of hard work that will lead us to where we need to go.

My ammunition has changed.
In all honesty, I did not do my undergrad alone. There should be 3 names on the certificate I received from the University of Manitoba - my moma's, my fathar's, and mine. They were there every step of the way. Although we were a few-hours drive apart, they were with me through every exam and endured every assignment. Hey dad, do you remember the time during my first year of university when I cried on the phone to you for about an hour about the next day's sociology exam? Yeah, like that didn't stress you out too.
Now, not only do I have my parents, I have the unconditional love and support of my life partner. I could not have even dreamed up a more supportive, intelligent, and life-experienced husband. (Come on, is it not pretty handy that the person sitting beside me on this roller-coaster ride is someone who has been in a masters program before?!?)

In summary:
I have never been given a biger task in my entire life, but I also have never been this equipped or had a better reason to do it.

I have never been more challenged...But, I have never been more ready.






These pictures are for you momma - you know why!